February 22, 2010
Los Angeles, CA, USA
You are going to love this place once it gets going. The idea for this blog came into my mind about 2 weeks ago. It was the beautiful culmination of previous thoughts and revelations. Which I will get into at depth, soon. But, not yet!
I’m a cooking aficionado. My grandma didn’t cook. Her culinary skill was pretty much limited to making orange juice. So, she vicariously sent my mother to cooking school. That was very cool. My mom could cook up a storm! And, I loved watching her cook. In 1971, when I was in high school, I was spending a lot of time hanging out at the Hare Krishna temple and I learned how to cook the most exotic food imaginable. My teacher learned directly from his guru in Vrindaban, India. So, I had the rather unique experience of being taught authentic, ancient recipes and cooking methods. More recently, I’ve enjoyed watching lots of weird stuff on the Food Network like Iron Chefs, Bocuse d’Or and intense competitions where sugar and chocolate are used as architectural materials.
Yet, when I saw my buddy Teddy Steuben cook I was in awe. He was disorganized, forgetful, he usually had the fire way too high and appeared to randomly add seasonings and other ingredients. In spite of that, 95% of the time the food that comes out of his kitchen is excellent. It’s as good as I would hope to get at the most expensive and fashionable restaurants. His dishes are always unique, original and healthy. I was so surprised by the wonderful tastes and textures he served up I used to half-jokingly tell him he should open a restaurant.
I’ve known Teddy for about 2½ years. It was clear from the day I met him his experience of life and way of living it were different than mine. My mom was taught to wash knives and pots as she cooked. When her food was done, the kitchen was completely clean. At the Hare Krishna temple, Paramahamsa used to make rice, mung dal soup, a curried vegetable dish or two, chapatis, a drink and dessert – all from scratch – in an hour. Both of them taught me all the food should be done at the same time. Maybe, that’s why I like the cooking competitions on the Food Network. To me, cooking was a planned, organized, carefully executed activity.
My dear friend Teddy is the polar opposite of that. He can lose the top to a jar without leaving his kitchen. Organization does not come naturally to him. Fortunately, since he’s a very bright guy, he learned decades ago to make lots of lists and write down everything he has to do in an appointment book. For a while I tried to get him to modernize and use his computer for that. But, as I got to know him better I could understand that if something works for him he’s better off to keep doing it that way. There are many ways Teddy’s experiences differ from mine – some good and some not so good. But, I’ll go into that in detail later. I have video that needs editing right now. I did promise a video blog, after all.
About 6 weeks ago (early January, 2010) I did some reading about Adult ADHD. Talk about a jaw dropper! Not only was it clear Teddy had this condition, but it accounted for things I just attributed to quirkiness. “Oh, that’s Teddy for ya.” He didn’t know he had it because he’s 64 years old. There was no childhood diagnosis available for him. Even today it’s a very misunderstood condition and most people know next to nothing about it. I sure didn’t. But, once I learned, I needed to tell him. It was easy to see how this condition would cause serious self-esteem issues. The day we met, he told me he wasn’t as smart as I was. I never believed that. He could grasp complex ideas with ease. Yet, some things are tough for him to learn to do or remember to do. So, I was anxious to tell him, “Here’s proof you aren’t stupid. You are a victim of distraction.” We’re both happier now that we know what’s going on with him. You or someone you know may have undiagnosed Adult ADHD. Becoming aware of it will make your life better.
There’s also a lot of beauty to ADHD. There’s a spontaneity and a freshness that ADHD imparts to people. As I learned more about it, I realized the way Teddy cooks is directly related to his Adult ADHD. That was when I got the idea for this blog. Here’s what we hope to achieve with it:
1. Showcase Teddy’s amazing cooking abilities
2. Create Awareness of Adult ADHD within the community in a positive way
Thank you and I hope you enjoy the blog. I’ll have some videos up in about a week.
Sincerely,
Randy
{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }
I followed your post from Facebook to get here. I haven’t had time to check everything out yet but am very intrigued. My 16 year old son is ADHD, diagnosed in 1st grade. It is a battle everyday to teach him that he can’t use his ADHD as an excuse and needs to learn to channel his energy in a positive way. I am looking forward to finding new information for him through your site. Thanks for putting it out there in a good way.
Thanks for the nice comment, Elsie. When Teddy was about your son’s age, he started surfing. He says that really changed his life. It gave him confidence he could be good at something. People with ADHD have special gifts. I’m sure your son is no exception. With your continued support and understanding he can rise to greatness. A lot of ADHD people have. I wish you both the best and hope you continue to enjoy our blog. Thanks, again.
saw your post on craigslist forums. i haven’t yet but will delve further into what you’ve worked on to share… what is so incredibly striking to me about you and this experience with teddy is the fact that you were able to move past the “he’s just quirky” thing and seriously consider that perhaps this 64 year old man was ADHD. i’d just like to sincerely recognize and compliment you on having the tremendous sense of compassion that you seem to have and the ability to think out of the box, to do your homework and educate yourself on a subject and be able to cohesively put it all together and come to an opinion or build/change a belief system that veers far off the beaten path of what is considered the “norm.” i am 37 years old and recently have had some painful, life-changing events that have caused me to re-examine my life and my whole set of values and those of the people around me. rolling forward because i’d have to write a book to make any sense if i start to explain what’s happened and how i’ve come to reach this conclusion now, so late in life, but with the help of one believer, i’ve finally come to the realization that i’ve been ADHD. and i can’t get help because mainstream medicine requires a mountain of evidence existing from one’s childhood to diagnose and treat an adult as ADHD, not taking into account the fact that so many children with ADHD learn early on ways to cope and hide their “shortcomings” because their behavior that’s driven by the disorder is so undesirable and subject to disapproval or punishment or alienation by parents who are unaware, ignorant, choose to ignore, are absent, etc. and the child is so desperate to be loved he does anything in effort to get it – not yet capable of knowing what is really happening or the long term consequences of “doing anything” to get validation and love. i was one of those kids who knew what behaviors – the ones beyond my control, driven by the ADHD – would cause displeasure with me to my very shallow “what will the neighbors think?” parents and until the age of 30, i spent my years struggling to hide all of that. and i was very successful at doing so… i graduated 4.0 from h.s. and magna cum laude in college with a marketing degree, as an adult i’ve held 3 jobs at top-flight, house-hold name companies for 5 or so years at a stretch, all pretty long term because i am the “perfect” do anything to get the job done kind of employee smiling all the while, i produced results and companies like that, and each successive job change saw me moving me higher up the corp ladder & into 6 figure scale until at 30, with little warning, i snapped. i had what casual observers might call a nervous breakdown – i was diagnosed bipolar on the basis of one single hypo-manic like episode that precipitated the breakdown that i have recently come to conclude was my body telling me… ENOUGH of this pretending and pleasing and working… and looking back at my initial medical record from my first hospitaliztion, the recurring theme is “patient keeps saying he wants to take a break from life, readily surrenderd his work issued blackberry cell phone and asked us what the likelihood was it would be stolen, and became anxious when told internet access was freely available at anytime, might be prone to exaggerate symptoms to delay discharge…” i didn’t have a nervous breakdown per se, i broke down from exhaustion… from working endlessly to please people and cover my “weakness.” ok, it’s a book here, let me close by again thanking you for taking the time to have a different voice that stands out among the monotony in our society in effort to educate so people can understand. i look forward to reading all you have to offer. thank you.
Thank you for such a nice comment, Tom. I’m glad you appreciate what we’re trying to do here at The ADHD Chef. Please come back often and let us know how we’re doing. Thanks again!
What a great site! I was really moved by your first post. Something unheard of — a non-ADDer who really gets it! And what a great friend you are to Teddy.
Thank you. I’m so glad you like the site. That’s very encouraging to hear. Please come back often and tell your friends. Together we can spread awareness and understanding of this serious problem. Thanks again and have a great weekend! Happy Memorial Day!
Tom wrote that it is hard to diagnose an adult yet I went to my doctor with the suspicion that I would have it since my child was recently diagnosed and the doctor told me the porcentage of a family member having it is high once someone is already diagnosed. I think the first step is to talk about it with a counselor o therapist, I am saying this because my child will be graduating highschool this year and this was only diagnosed a few months ago after her therapist recomended an evaluation. We originally started seeing this therapist for anxiety related issues after the school insisted she needed additional help outside school. I so beat myself up for not recognizing the symptoms much earlier and it is such a shame that teachers are not allowed to voice their concern in this matter to parents. Some public awareness is really needed for this disability just like your blog, with a sense of humor and a positive note. This would certainly help with anybody’s self esteem if they are ADHD!
Tom, sorry! I had an ADHD moment (lol) and forgot to say it is a shame you had to go through all that to figure it out. You are a better person for recognizing that you have absolute control over your life and did not take their opinion as face value. You are the best advocate for your own health, nobody knows you the way you know yourself!